The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight (maeincarnate) wrote,
The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight
maeincarnate

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It's Friday Poll Time!

Poll #710174 Friday! Friday!! Friday!!!

ao -- What is more fun to monkeys: analingus or throwing balls of reeds?

Analingus - But if the forwards I've gotten over the years are to be believed, the one having more fun is probably not the one you expect.
4(28.6%)
Throwing balls of reeds - hell, you can lick asshole any day. Finding somebody to play reedcatch with is gold.
10(71.4%)

observacious -- What is the worst fashion trend for spring?

Gaucho Pants
1(7.7%)
The return of the big diagonal belt/tunic look
6(46.2%)
Ribbon-up-the-calf espadrilles
4(30.8%)
Detailing! Detailing!! Detailing!!!
2(15.4%)

absolutcalm -- David Spade is dating Heather Locklear. Considering he sold his soul to the dark lord for a mediocre career and name recognition, how is this feat possible? [The Spade Camp has denied the rumor. The idea of a Spade Camp sounds just awful.]

Maybe they weren't kidding about how ladies liking a man who can make them laugh, but what's that got to do with these two?
4(28.6%)
Every short scrawny skinny guy I've known has a shockingly large dick.
2(14.3%)
She wanted to see if Pam Anderson would take her seconds this time.
0(0.0%)
He sold Farley's soul for name recognition and a career. He bought Heather with his own.
8(57.1%)

renob423 -- have people REALLY had enough of the bee questions, or do they want more stupid bee questions?

You better bee-lieve we're sick of the bee questions.
5(38.5%)
What do you think they are, mindless drones?
4(30.8%)
Enough already. It's really starting to bug.
0(0.0%)
They better stop soon. I'm running out of bee-related puns.
4(30.8%)

bobwhite -- Have you ever farted so loudly that it woke others from their slumber?

Just the other day, in fact.
2(14.3%)
Not that I know of.
6(42.9%)
I farted so loudly I've woken myself up, does that count?
5(35.7%)
I don't fart. Period.
1(7.1%)

demoninmyskull -- If I am a pollketeer, when do I get my hat? All the _____-teers have hats. (Asshat is not an acceptable answer unless it is answer c.)

You'll get your hat once you realize you can't just go writing questions with blanks and expecting to get four fill-ins for it.
2(14.3%)
The hat is a metaphor. You must find the hat within.
5(35.7%)
Asshat is so 2003.
7(50.0%)
The Pollketeers will don no flair as long as I'm queen of this here hive. Okay I had one more bee pun left.
0(0.0%)

coldblackncold -- What cannot be secretly replaced with Folgers Crystals?

Crystal Light
0(0.0%)
Crystal Methamphetamine
4(30.8%)
Crystal Pepsi
4(30.8%)
The Dark Crystal
5(38.5%)

friendship7 -- What's the best board game? [The answer is Settlers of Catan, but rather than ostracize anyone who may not be in the know, we'll go classics:]

Monopoly
4(28.6%)
Trivial Pursuit
3(21.4%)
Sorry!
0(0.0%)
Life
3(21.4%)
Scrabble
3(21.4%)
Risk
1(7.1%)

petdance -- My butt falls asleep whenever I sit on this couch for long periods of time, so why do I keep doing it?

What do you need an awake butt for?
3(21.4%)
Sounds like somebody hasn't worked in a solid ass groove.
4(28.6%)
The networks just keep producing hour after hour of quality programming.
3(21.4%)
I dunno. You're lazy?
4(28.6%)

twicketface -- What will be the next evolutionary advantage for humans?

We will gain conscious control over our metabolic rate and be able to slow it down or speed it up depending on conditions and consumption.
5(35.7%)
12 fingers. Sure it will render QWERTY keyboards obsolete, but typing speeds will be astronomical.
4(28.6%)
Reproductive cells will generate at the same rate as and stay in proportion with brain cells.
3(21.4%)
Since genetic flaws have been sidestepped by surgery and drugs, but never fully eliminated, life expectancy will drop by about 20 years, and there will be no need to protect the weakened elderly.
2(14.3%)

eideteker -- OMG NATURAL ONE IS LIKE MY THEME SONG!!! HOW DID YOU KNOW?!

Every time you hear it you suddenly smell butterscotch.
1(8.3%)
I HAVE NO LEGS. I HAVE NO LEGS.
8(66.7%)
I figured a one-trick-pony would be right up your alley.
1(8.3%)
For all that talk about the Cardigans in the comments last week, you're sure a Fickle Frankie today.
2(16.7%)

calamine_tea -- What was Britney thinking?

Since MTV won't play videos anymore, maybe if I kiss this old lady on the mouth I'll be on TV again.
0(0.0%)
This developmentally-disabled manchild will always need me. I'll never be lonely again and he'll never grow up.
6(46.2%)
I spent years doing everything I could to seem intelligent, talented, or at the very least, hygienic. I deserve a break.
5(38.5%)
My fans love Cheetos too. They're not going to knock me for orange fingers! I'm pregnant, for crying out loud.
2(15.4%)

pooplord -- Free happy hours every other Friday at my new law firm: yea or nay? PS, they start at 4:30.

What? Are you asking us if they exist? I don't know. The 4:30 part is a little suspicious, but I'll buy it.
2(15.4%)
Are you actually asking if you should go to these? Someone is offering you free happy hours. Don't question it.
7(53.8%)
Yea. But be sure to talk a whole lot about how you're going to go back to the office later, or how your co-workers really shouldn't be here with all those projects they have "up in the air".
3(23.1%)
Nay. You probably should stay at work on Fridays until like 9:30 establishing yourself as a stickinthemud.
1(7.7%)

I hate myself for watching _________ but I can't stop.

ASK TEH INTERNETS.

Tags: friday poll
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