The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight (maeincarnate) wrote,
The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight
maeincarnate

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It's Friday Poll Time!

Poll #811908 Friday! Friday!! Friday!!!

coldblackncold -- J. Peterman has an archive of Ziggy. What else has he archived?

The names of each of the 31 flavors at the Baskin Robbins on 6th Ave as recorded on the fourth Friday of each month.
3(17.6%)
Fortune cookie fortunes, searchable by date, theme, lucky numbers, and restaurant of origin.
9(52.9%)
The messages on the letterboard in front of the First Presbyterian Church of Bensalem, PA, 1974-present.
2(11.8%)
The average speed, number of stops, and time from button-to-arrival of the Peterman building elevators.
3(17.6%)

soarjubs -- Anyone think they look like their aviator? (Thank you, Yahoo Answers!)

I don't usually wear bomber jackets and white scarves.
4(23.5%)
I don't think. I know.
1(5.9%)
Two-dimensional and 6-colored. A dead match.
2(11.8%)
LOLZ ITS AVATAR NOT AVIATOR JEEZ.
10(58.8%)

eideteker -- What was up with that last guy's question? What's up with that guy, for that matter?

The animal-asses question wasn't his. I added it because the poll was a little thin last week.
1(6.2%)
He's my Main Squeeze.
0(0.0%)
I asked him for his question last Thursday and he choked.
1(6.2%)
If he's not going to get an LJ username, I should probably give him a clever internonymous name so he doesn't have to be "that guy".
10(62.5%)

twicketface -- I've solved the seatbelt debate - if you don't wear one and get in an accident, your insurance pays nothing. What am I missing?

In the pansyass fake-disease nanny culture we've up and cultivated for ourselves, such cut-and-dry solutions are impractical. Each case must be considered on an individual basis.
7(41.2%)
How do you expect to keep lawyers in business with ideas like that?
4(23.5%)
Because if that comes true, auto makers will be installing wheel locking devices and digitized screams in order to "remind" us to put on our seat belts. We'll be wishing for the good old days of the annoying chimes.
2(11.8%)
That sounds just fine in theory, but in practice? No way. I'm usually way too drunk to remember to put on my seat belt.
4(23.5%)

ao -- Since I honestly don't believe Japan exists, what is the *real* reason for Japanise pop culture?

It's a sociological experiment to see how many people will actually sit through Samurai Champloo if they think it's hip and "Japanese".
3(17.6%)
Most of the more powerful men in America have simple white cotton panty fetishes. Japanese culture was created to provide contrasting normalization.
5(29.4%)
Japan hasn't existed since we sank it with the A-bomb in WWII, but people might start asking questions if we never heard from them. The weirder the stuff we hear, the less likely we are to look too closely at it.
4(23.5%)
The Japanese have been running the US for years. Exposure to Japanese pop culture is intended to acclimate us to the eventual subjugation.
5(29.4%)

friendship7 -- If you can make the jump in the training exercise on the Nebuchadnezzar (and it is implied that many do), shouldn't you be able to fly as well? I admit I had to google this to figure out what the hell it meant. I think I'm the only nerd alive who doesn't like even the 1st Matrix. Answers have been outsourced.

Only if you think you can.
4(23.5%)
Obviously not. Sure, you can bend the rules, but you can't break them.
6(35.3%)
You can do anything they can upload to your brain.
1(5.9%)
I hated the Matrix too. Way to blow a awesome sci-fi movie with hours and hours of redundant kung fu.
6(35.3%)

anonymous1327 -- Why isn't Céline Dion dead yet?

As awful as she is, she's not despicable enough for anyone to put psycho killer effort into stalking her.
3(17.6%)
The average lifespan of the Canadian Longnecked Shrillstress is approximately 94 years.
8(47.1%)
In spite of being an annoying singer, she's in shockingly good health.
3(17.6%)
She has yet to actualize her true greatness. You can't deny her that.
3(17.6%)

bobwhite -- Why do MegaMen Ultra Vitamins make my urine neon green?

I would expect MegaMan vitamins to make you shoot pellets out of your forearm.
12(70.6%)
My vitamins make my urine highligher yellow. Green? Freaky.
1(5.9%)
Because everyone already knows to fear the yellow snow.
0(0.0%)
Green urine is the result of the chemical reaction between healthy products being introduced in an unhealthy environment. Clean-living folks experience similar side effects when they do unhealthy things like smoke and drink beer.
4(23.5%)

renob423 -- if i buy a $2.99 bottle of wine with a year on it, then wait like 25 years, will i be able to sell that bottle of wine for like $1,000 cause it's old and wine dorks like old wine?

Absolutely. Wine Spectator just did a piece on the more subtle nuances of the 2006 Boone's Farm Vintage, saying they haven't seen as fine a sugar wine since 1991.
3(17.6%)
If it all hasn't evaporated by then, sure. Most wine dorks only collect wine for show.
1(5.9%)
I saw a bum the other day with a 1988 bottle of Night Train, but I don't think that was still the wine in there. He'd probably still have taken the $2.99 for it.
5(29.4%)
What do you have to lose? 25 years and about a foot of closet space?
8(47.1%)

absolutcalm -- What with Survivor going all racist, what's the next big reality show created to exploit the seething hatred beneath the surface of American society?

Survivor: Rio Grande. Contestants parachute from 30,000' into the Mexican countryside with $4.86, a 20oz. bottle of water, and a fake ID made by some stoner at the University of West Virginia.
2(11.8%)
No Fat Chicks. After 3 straight months of continuous ridicule, restrictive diet, and a weekly meeting outlining their flaws, these six women will learn the skills to hate themselves for what they really are - unfuckable failures.
7(41.2%)
Trading Tax Brackets. A CEO and a Hardee's Manager trade paychecks for a few weeks. Sure the poor guy is probably going to buy a lot of gaudy crap and the CEO could live off his interest for a year or two, but there will be plenty of fake drama.
3(17.6%)
Last Cripple Standing. 'Nuff said.
5(29.4%)

clockwatcher -- why do I always fear being judged if I don't have a good Friday question even though I don't know anyone on your friends list? If it makes you feel better, I don't know everyone here and I worry about them not liking their answers.

It's natural to feel competitive in an open comedy forum. You don't want to be the schmucko with the lame joke.
1(5.9%)
Nobody's going to judge you for submitting a question. Questions keep the poll alive. If everyone chickened out of questions, we'd have to go back to weeks up on weeks of Mej's preoccupation with Ghostbusters.
5(29.4%)
Friday Poll questions are like children. We love them all. Except lame ones, who know who they are.
8(47.1%)
Because you judge other people by their questions. Admit it.
3(17.6%)

subbes -- Best birthday gift ever: $500, or blowjob?

Blowjobs? Priceless.
5(31.2%)
$500 can buy you many blowjobs.
11(68.8%)

sublimal -- I like friday poll the way i like my men..

Finished after about a dozen pushes.
3(17.6%)
Consciously aviodant of serious topics of discussion.
0(0.0%)
Preoccupied with sexual innuendo.
8(47.1%)
Self-obsessed and constantly whining passive aggressively for compliments.
6(35.3%)

calamine_tea -- What does Maeincarnate want to do the most when she visits Atlanta?

Go to the Disco Diner and be waited on by Miss Frederick.
1(5.9%)
$2 PBRs at the Claremont Lounge.
6(35.3%)
Get down, get crunky.
5(29.4%)
Do each other's hair and makeup and be bestest friends forever and ever.
5(29.4%)

thedrandmr -- Why does my neutered dog still lick his shriveld nutsack?

Because he doesn't really understand TV. What else is he going to do.
3(17.6%)
So what if it's shriveld and useless? It's still his nutsack.
9(52.9%)
Hey, I still lick my grandmoth...oh. um. yeah. I dunno.
0(0.0%)
Because it tastes so good.
5(29.4%)

From the earlier alluded "That Guy": When will the Muffin King finally come?

Last I heard he was a Muffin Man. Did the old Muffin King die?
10(58.8%)
Under the proper conditions, 8-12 minutes.
2(11.8%)
After the "muffin tops" incident, things are still a little shaky for bakery royalty.
2(11.8%)
Depends on the Muffin Queen! Ba-dum dum!
3(17.6%)

Does anybody really give a shit about tennis?

Like most sports, unless there's some colorful personality involved, like that foul-mouthed guy with the headbands in the 80's, nobody gives a shit. See also: Tiger Woods.
5(29.4%)
Tennis used to mean frumpy dykes. Now it means hot chicks. Not that they make tennis interesting or anything.
3(17.6%)
Snobs from New England.
1(5.9%)
Nope. They can try and try with their American Express commercials and whatnot, but in the end it's tennis, and it sucks.
8(47.1%)

YOUR QUESTION HERE

Tags: friday poll
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