July 27th, 2001

JOY

Belching. Constantly Belching.

On the train in today, I was merrily sitting there, reading my paper when I started hearing this popping/kinda ripping sound. It took me a little while to realize that it was coming from the woman behind me who was sitting in the outside seat with her bag on the inside seat. Now, normally I make a point of disrupting people like this, even if there are seats open elsewhere (who the hell do you think you are sucking up two whole seats), but for some reason I opted to sit next to the gentle-looking if geeky bespectacled young gentleman in front of her.

Anyhoo, a few pops and hisses later, I realize that this woman is belching. And not like a little burp, it sounded like that holy-shit-get-me-a-bucket kind of belch. You know how they tell you to listen to the microwave popcorn for when the pops are more than five seconds apart? This woman was still popping strong and I was worried that the nape of my neck would bear the grunt of her if she were to be "done" any time soon. Then, suddenly, she quieted.

Moments later, she sarted up again, fortunately right before my stop. I got up and stood by the door, muttering a few "disgustingpigdoganimal" type things under my breath and shooting a dirty look or two. I continued the evil-eye stare as I walked off the train. Through the window I noticed, however that all of my toughchick efforts were in vain.

She was passed out the whole time.