November 8th, 2001

JOY

Merh.

I hate making posts when I’m feeling low. I don’t want to bum anyone out and know there’s not really much I can say about feeling down that either hasn’t been said before or matters a whole lot in the grand scheme anyway. It really depresses me when I don’t have anything to write about. I mean, what better indication that there is either nothing going on or I just haven’t been paying attention.

Every day, I get up later than I had intended, I get ready, get stressed out and pissed off on the train, come to work, sit around waiting for some instruction, go to the gym (for now at least; I just joined yesterday and I hope to be able to keep it up), come home, eat dinner, make my lunch and maybe have a little time to goof off before it’s time to go to bed. A friend of mine from Jersey called me yesterday and asked me what’s new and everything and I didn’t have anything to say. I saw friends I hadn’t seen in months and some in years on Tuesday night and it was the same thing. “I live in Arlington now…yeah…no, no roommates…I love living by myself…in DC…around 14th & M…nah, not really…ya know, just hanging out…you?”

I don’t have the time to do anything else more with my weekday nor do I have the money to even if I made the time. I hate my job but I’m afraid of not finding another one or finding out they all suck once I get it. I love my apartment, so I’m afraid of trying out something new that would make it impossible financially for me to keep it.

So bleh. I wrote while I’m feeling bad. That’s all you’re going to get. I feel really exposed even posting it. That is all. I shall think of something lighthearted and jovial to write about soon. Thank you, drive thru.
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