Last night, I was late for happy hour because I was pulled into a private meeting with my asshole boss that started out with a discussion of his soon-to-be-born baby, segued into how a discussion on how important it is that I agree with him, then a discussion about how rude I am, and resulted in him lending me his umbrella.
I left that umbrella at the bar.
In other ridiculous news of last night:
While I was walking to the bar, I saw one of those plastic band things that are used to keep bundles of newspapers together lying on the sidewalk. Growing up with a former paperboy for a brother, I am privvy to the fact that if you step on these things just right, they make a neat snapping sound. I step on the thing to make the sound, fail, somehow manage to get my other foot tangled up in it, and take a big'ole facer right there on the sidewalk.
This all happened at around 6pm while walking on M Street, one of the busier streets in downtown Washington DC. The only verbal confirmation of my suspicion that everyone and their brother saw me splat flat out on the sidewalk was the couple loading their van nearby who told me I "gotta slow down, girl!"
Adding injury to insult, I managed to break my fall with the hand that I broke a few years ago, and it smarts like a sonofabitch today.
Either that or some sort of hurricane is coming.