The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight (maeincarnate) wrote,
The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight
maeincarnate

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Pop Culture Whore Stock Report

MTV's The Real World (PCW symbol: TRW) is finding themselves back in the PCW Top Ten of late with their most recent Paris season. Near-catastrophic losses were incurred during the previous season in Las Vegas when Bunim/Murray Productions repeated the Chicago season flub of mistaking a six-month-long "will they/won't they" for entertainment. BMP owes a debt of gratitude to Frank, the only redeeming factor of the Vegas season, and the sole reason they weren't lumped in with the penny stocks. Like Las Vegas, Paris owes their fast and strong gains to one cast member in particular. CT, the most recent TRW Bahstohnian, has demonstrated characteristics in a TRW cast member that have yet to be seen previously. A representative at BMP reassures any doubtful potential investor with, "This is the TRW featured roommate that we all have been waiting for. Finally, someone we can relate to; someone we all went to college with. Not just someone we'd tolerate if we were stuck on a plane together, someone you'd really want to hang out with." Speculations remain high.

The IPO of MTV's latest crack at Osbournes (PCW: OZB) success came as a shock to analysts since the inception date. Convinced it was a one-time True Life-esque docudrama, early investors were pleased to find Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica (PCW: NNJ) returning to PCW screens the following week. NNJ is the reality-based tale of a normal guy who happened to be in a B-rate boy band whose ambling fate found him married to a B-rate pop star. Preliminary murmurings on the PCW floor have the show re-coined as "The Nick Show" and futures for Mr. Lachey are glowing. Whether Mrs. Lachey will produce any surges for NNJ is yet to be determined.

In buying and selling news, it appears that Madonna (PCW: Mda) and Missy "Misdemeanor" Elliot (PCW: MME) have executed an even share trade following the release of their Gap commercial. Never before has such a flawless exchange of value been recorded in PCW history: MME's gains were in exact proportion to Mda's losses. "'Everybody comes to Hollywood'?!?! Sell! Sell! Sell!"

Comedy Central (PCW: COM) has continued their winning streak with the latest situation-absurdity Reno 911 (PCW: 911). The low-peaking Viva Variety (PCW: ViVa) notwithstanding, former members of The State (PCW: Ste) ensure returns on investment, even if in the short term. Like other fast and furious COM successes, 911 runs the risk of suffering the fate of Strangers With Candy (PCW: SWC), where excesses of comedy capital leave the show vulnerable to cancellation. "It was just too damn funny. We didn't do anything wrong...we were just too much too soon," said the SWC team. Long-term success is possible for shows on COM, as evidenced by the second season return of Insomniac with Dave Attell (PCW: IDA), but VCRs are still rolling.
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