The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight (maeincarnate) wrote,
The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight

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Porno Gym Lady

Okay, so like I'm in my regular Tuesday night class at the gym and it's going great as usual but I notice there's this woman in the front who only shows up sometimes. We're doing stuff on the step and whatever and then I hear this "whoo!" and I didn't see where it came from but I knew right away it was her. Last time she was there she did the same thing. She's all "unnngh!" and "yeah!" and "aaaaaooooooowwwwwwww!" while she's doing her reps and and making these big blowing out noises that are like way louder than anyone and even the instructor was all "yeah, that's right. Blow out when you press up. Yup. I'm glad to hear you're blowing out". After a really hard set of tricep stuff the woman even goes, "ooooohh...mommy! I want my mommy." I couldn't take it. It even distracted me from the spaz boy who shows up and tries to be all tough but does his things all wrong and exaggerates everything and generally looks way dumb when he does anything.

So finally class is over and I talk to my friends who were laughing at the woman the whole time and one of my friends comes up to me and is all, "Praise the Lord!!!" and I said no way, it's more like "mmmmmmmmmmm uh-huh yeaaaaaaah give it to me" all porno like. I'm making faces and moaning and who's behind me but he woman. I wanted to curl up and die but the instructor comes over and asks my friend what she and the other girl were laughing about the whole time and she's all "oh, the other girl was joking about asking for more reps ha ha" Swish.

So I'm running out and I see clockwatcher and I'm all "omfg I was totally mocking that woman and she was right behind me" I'm sure the coast was clear and all, but I still had to run out of the room because I thought porno gym lady was going to come and beat me up or give me a few snaps in my face or something. Yeah. I have a witness too. clockwatcher was there the whole time and can back me up.

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