The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight (maeincarnate) wrote,
The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight
maeincarnate

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My head hurts too much to be witty

Today has been a struggle. I woke up drunk at 8:43, which so happens to be approximately an hour and a half late, somewhat confused as to what was going on. I had passed out somewhere around 3:30 after putting down a Duvel and quite a few vodka cran’s at Heaven. Normally, my school night instincts kick in when going out during the week, and I tend to have more sense than to get that drunk and then mess around on the internet for an hour or so before going to bed when I have work the next day. But I guess exceptions make the rule.

I stumbled out of bed, went into the bathroom and began running the shower, all the while overcome with a sense of surrealism mixed with nausea. I showered faster than I have since…well, I can’t remember, poured myself a nice glass of Liquid Hangover Cure, got ready at breakneck speed (but just slow enough to keep me from getting dizzy) and was in the car by 9:04.

Here’s where I have to commend my own bravado: knowing that I was already really late, but also knowing that that hollow pain in my stomach and swimming in my head wouldn’t go away without one magical cure-all, I turned out of my parking lot in the opposite direction of DC and went to the McDonalds up the street. All of the other pre-work breakfasters must have been responsible enough not to be as late and hung over at me, because there wasn’t a soul on line. I was back in the car and heading towards work by 9:11. The same tardiness benefit applied to the traffic, so I got to the office rather quickly. Willing to pay the exorbitant garage rate rather than search for parking, I pulled into the first place that I saw that had an “Early Bird $8.00 Special” and handed the attendant a twenty. He handed me eight dollars back, and I suggested that he might have gotten the numbers confused. He said that the eight dollar deal was only good until nine (late to work clock running at 9:28 now), so I told him that I didn’t want it and he gave me my money back with far less resistance than I expected. Justice smiled upon me as I was able to find a parking spot on the street right across from my building.

Today, our office closed at noon to kickstart the Labor Day weekend. So I knew I only had two and a half hours to go before I could come home and go to bed. I had barely gotten my instant messenger started when a co-worker invited me to come to the CVS with her across the street. To make the work part of this story short, for the sake of brevity and because it was pretty much a blur to me too, I did nothing today. Zilch. When I got back from CVS, I played around on the internet, looked at some hotels on the Mariott website (don’t ask me why) and chitchatted online and with co-workers until noon. By 12:01, my chair was spinning and my ass was out the door.

I don’t know if anyone else suffers from this, but when I’m hung over, I can’t stop eating. I’m constantly and insatiably hungry. So I figured I’d stop by the supermarket on the way home and pick up some turkey so I could make a sandwich. Damn you Harris Teeter and your fantastic pre-made food section! Damn you to hell! If you would only slip up once, maybe we could get some peace!

My routine grocery stop became a snacking frenzy. I went in for turkey and maybe some of that pre-cooked refrigerated chicken pieces, but I walked out those items along with a meat loaf sandwich, a mini-baguette, flavored cream cheese, a cucumber, macaroni salad, yogurt, and of all things, a tray of California Rolls (I know--I’m as surprised as you are). Since I have been home, I have managed to pick at most of those things and catch a few episodes of SNL reruns. I’m still torn as to whether or not to spend the afternoon taking a nap or watching Godfather II.
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