htothem -- What will it take to end the misconception that the faux hawk is cool?
Another equally insipid pesudorebellious hairstyle. Those who embrace the fauxhawk don't notice things like saturation. To them, that the guys on The Hills have one means it's cool. Not until the next fauxhawk comes along will it be pushed away.
Get Angelina to shave the one off Asian Baby #1.
If some actual cool people started wearing them ironically, those who wear them seriously might interpret this as their look being taken over by losers.
Whatever it is, can we use it to try to break the misconception that the mowhawk is cool?
renob423 -- what was the 1st animal you accidently ran over in your car, and what is the biggest animal you accidently ran over in your car?
Four days after my 17th birthday. It's 6:55am and I'm on Calais Road heading to school, when like a flash, a chipmunk comes darting...what the fuck? I have no idea what the first animal I ran over was.
The answer to both questions, ironically enough, is a horse. You'd think it would be more difficult for a Corolla to actually get over the body of the horse without teetering on it's belly, but stranger things have happened.
My little brother. PEOPEL ARE ANIMALS TOO!
Accidentally...yes. In 1997 when I accidentally drove through the Crowley's fence, I accidentally ran over some chickens, and I even accidentally ran over a few of his sheep. Bill Crowley was always accidentally being a mean old bastard anyway.
observacious -- Why, oh why, did my brain start thinking about the theme from "The Greatest American Hero" just as I was trying to go to sleep?
You sleep next to Bob White. What else would you expect to happen?
These are the sorts of things that have to creep in from our subconscious because otherwise they would be too perplexing. I mean, were we really supposed to believe the Greatest American Hero would have such a lamo theme song?
You know how sometimes right when you fall asleep you get that feeling like you just went down the first hill of a roller coaster? Believe it or not, I'm walking on air...
In these trying times of terrorism and global unrest we all look to certain ideals to help us sleep at night. We live in a time when the need for the Greatest American Hero is most dire.
clockwatcher -- Which is the better "tribute" band: Super Diamond, or Bjorn Again?
Super Diamond. If anyone needs tribute paid to them, it's Neil Diamond.
Bjorn Again. Think of it more as homage. The glory of ABBA can't be repeated, only reflected.
popespydie -- Have you ever had a joke that was so wrong that you knew you shouldn't say it because it was so offcolor and inappropriate, but it was killing you not to?
I know you're trying to tempt me into writing four of the most foul jokes I have ever heard, but I'm not taking the bait. Okay, fine I would have done it but I can only think of one and I'm at work so I really shouldn't be googling any more.
Of course. And once I am in the private company of my friends who will still like me no matter what I say and probably have the same sick streak to their sense of humor, I will tell it with flourish.
No. Perpetuating stereotypes and making cruel assumptions about groups of people is never funny, and I would be apalled if someone told me such a joke.
Being a black Jewish blonde woman in a wheelchair and a distant relative of Helen Keller, people don't tell all that many jokes around me.
For giggles and shits, those of you who have more control over your computers than to just click radio buttons, please provide the punchline only of the most offensive and wrong joke you've ever heard.
eideteker -- Oh man! It's Friday night, and I'm in the mood for ________.
Chinese food, Yeungling, and a House rerun.
Spider solitaire and an exhaustive search of MySpace for people I once knew who might be famous.
Heading to the theater to spend $10 to hopefully get one of the last 15 tickets available for the movie that opened last night so I can spend 3 hours listening to animals talk to each other the whole time.
A happy hour with my co-workers in which I spend 3 hours drinking heavily on an empty stomach, get talked into a few Jager shots, tell a few too many people about how I don't like the new guy, then take a cab home before I really embarass myself.
soarjubs -- Is it wrong to get pissed when someone who owns a stinky, overly peppy annoying dog acts like I'm Adolf Hitler killing baby dolphins with live baby seals because they don't want to discipline cute, shmoopy roverkins when he's being annoying?
How could you expect an adult to dicipline their dog? How could I say a harsh word to such a cute schmoopie, you meanie! I'm so sorry Poochie! It's my fault I brought over other humans when I haven't trained you! You're just so excited yes you are!
No, it is not wrong. It would also not be wrong to grab that dog owner by the scruff of their neck and shove their face in Roverkin's poop to teach them that it's impolite to inflict their property upon their guests.
Roverkins isn't being annoying! Lookit how cute he is jumping around smelling like wet shit and scratching you with his little claws, barking and tripping you! Lookit his little eyes! He's thinking, "why won't you play with me?"
No, it is not wrong. Next time this person comes over to your house, pay a bum $20 to sit next to them, begging for change and licking their hands. Then when they ask why he's there, say "OH LOOKIT HIS LITTLE EYES! HE JUST WANTS TO PLAY!"
subbes -- The back window of my car is covered in pollen. Since I'm not about to wash my car, what's the best thing to draw on it?
Draw? I'm not much of an artist. I'd probably write FLOWER JIZ or something to that effect.
absolutcalm -- What is the best office situation in which one can scream "this. is. SPARTA!!!!" and kick a coworker down the stairs/elevator shaft/cubicle/etc?
The Vice President of Human Resources introduced a new policy that she and that crusty old VP of Finance came up with in which Casual Fridays will be suspended until further notice, as they feel casual dress fosters a casual work ethic.
Whenever the bigwigs have a meeting in the 5th floor conference room, the lefotover food goes to the 5th floor kitchen for the people in the 5th floor cubes to enjoy. Somehow some 7th floor people found out there were cookies down here.
Following the mass layoffs and the recent merge of our two flagship offices, those of you who reported to John Kelly will now report to Brian Welsh.
Due to cutbacks, and the high cost of coffee, filtered water, and other breakroom supplies, a usage fee of $10 per pay period will be applied to each employee's paycheck.
Probably about a year ago, I discovered that my train ride to my old job was almost exactly as long as Bauhaus' Bela Legosi's Dead. The other day, en route to my current job, my ipod switched songs as I was turning off of my street and it ended just as I was parking. My current commute is about as long as:
Champagne Supernova by Oasis.
Purple Rain by Prince.
Freedom 90 by George Michael.
Temptation by New Order.