The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight (maeincarnate) wrote,
The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight

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An Inconvenient [Naked] Truth

A few weeks ago, a random woman struck up a conversation about Global Warming with me, which in and of itself is not that unusual; however, in this instance, the woman was wet and naked and the conversation took place while in the locker room at the gym. It came mostly out of nowhere: her complaining about the heat, me conversationally agreeing to the severity of the heat and the standard DC lament for the area's annual lack of autumn.

It was there where she turned an already uncomfortable unclothed locker room conversation into the kind of topic reserved for those who are at most acquainted, or at least fully-dressed: "And nobody cares about carbon emissions!"

Even after nearly 12 years in the area, I have yet to learn my lesson, and replied to this naked nutzo. "I think people care about carbon emissions."

"Maybe you and I do, maybe Al does, but not Joe America driving around in his Hummer!"

"Joe America can barely afford a Nissan Sentra. You've got to be pretty rich to drive a Hummer."

"Well, maybe so. But there's still people who don't believe in Global Warming!"

"Whether Global Warming is as severe as we're supposed to believe it is, it's hard not to be skeptical when the same people who tell you not to do something are the ones who do it to excess. If Al wants Joe America to quit driving Hummers, maybe he should quit flying around in a private plane." This was met with the usual stammering and wide eyes, to which I smiled and wished her a good one.

I hadn't seen her until today, when as luck would have it, she returned wet and naked from the shower just as I was having a casual half-dressed locker room conversation about the onset of winter with another gym member. As I was zipping up my bag to leave, she interjected, "Pfft! This isn't winter! We barely get a shoddy excuse for winter around here!" I hope the other girl is smarter than I am and just nodded along with the inevitable tirade.

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