The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight (maeincarnate) wrote,
The Mad Poller What Polls at Midnight

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If it's really worth a million dollars, why is it taped to the wall?

Since Au Bon Pain (which, as I may have mentioned is French for “Oh, Good Pain”) can take their stale everything and their shitty attitudes and shove it up their scones; since Cosi is on the wrong side of the street; since the gourmet café in the hotel next door’s flavors are too weak and they never have enough; since Starbucks is just…well…Starbucks; and since all I really want in the morning is a huge steaming cup of greasy spoon mud, I get my coffee at Jack’s Deli. Jack’s Deli, self-touted home of the “Baked Mini-Tater” pours some tasty goddamn joe. The regular is stiff and dark, the flavors come in such delicious varieties as Chocolate Raspberry, Southern Pecan, and Swiss Chocolate Almond.

Hanging behind the register at Jack’s is a one million dollar bill. It has a picture of the Statue of Liberty in the center, 1, 000,000 written in each corner and some official-looking signatures scattered around in the proper places.

This morning was the first time I noticed it, as while I was paying, the lady on line behind me asked the cashier if it was real. The cashier, whose loose grasp of the English language didn’t matters, nervously laughed and continued with my transaction. The lady persisted. “I’ve never seen a bill that big before. Is it real?” The cashier laughed and shook her head gently again. The lady pressed on.

I doubt I need to break down the real issue at hand, namely just how stupid this woman must be. What has been perplexing me since is just what kind of job she could be able to hold with such minimal critical thinking skills let alone sheer gullibility. From what I can tell, she’s qualified for nothing and is just another one of those people, like the ones on the metro who walk slow, who really has nothing to do but mingles with the world at nine in the morning just to get in everybody else’s way.

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